Powered by celery sticks, Capri-Sun and Big League Chew the Solid Gold Hits coasted to our first victory of the season. The 9-4 victory over the the West Coast Builders brought the Hits back up to the .500 mark and into shared possession of 2nd place.
Highlights of game #2 included:
* Betsy K. taking Team Momming to a whole new level with celery sticks, peanut butter, raisins, aerosol cheese in a can and Capri-Suns. Absolutely amazing.
* A female West Coast Builder doing a superfluous, head-first, belly flop slide into first base. It was unlike anything I had ever seen before and unlike anything I will ever see again.
* Z making a cash register sound (cha-ching!) in left field after one of the West Coast Builders least talented females, who clearly had never played ball before, struck out swinging. It was basically like gloating after arm wrestling a baby, but if we can't pick on those weaker than us then what have we got?
* Dawn B. bringing home the game ball in her Solid Gold Hits debut in which she already showed dramatic improvement by not wearing jeans. Welcome aboard, Dawn!
* Hillary B. hustling to score all the way from second on a hit to left field.
* Hit for a night, Ed F., getting psyched out by the razzing from his own dugout and striking out.
* Matt R. in his pitching debut for the Hits doing a heck of a job. Sure, he let up more runs and hits to the WCBs in the first inning than they had all of their previous game, but whatever.
It turns out that the only thing the West Coast Builders are building is a reputation as the worst team in the league. After their 17-0 embarrassment at the hands of the Luck Dragons last week, they are probably feeling pretty good about themselves for only losing 9-4 to us. Of course, unlike those hearltess Luck Dragons, we were just too kind to pile on more runs. Also unlike the Luck Dragons, we've been on the other end of games like this too many times.
Next week we play at 7:30pm against another unknown team, Old Skool. If they play as poorly as they spell then we are in luck.
Oh and a big thanks to Julie V. for securing victory breakfast pizza in this morning!
March 19, 2008
March 12, 2008
Hits Stumble Out of the Gate
Stupid Bulldogs.
Turns out the mysterious "The Bureau" team is actually just a revamped version of our old rivals, the Bulldogs. The only difference is that now they are really, really good. More accurately, they are really, really good again since they were a top-tier team last spring before things went downhill for them.
The Solid Gold Hits welcomed a few new players to the squad for this game and they did not disappoint. Terry showed up with a totally tricked out version of our jersey with a baseball logo, olde English font and a nickname, "Striker," on the back. Our other newcomer, Matt, pleased everyone with his ramshackle running of the bases, nearly hurting himself on numerous occasions. That's the kind of foundation the Hits are built on.
The Solid Gold Hits who, it should be mentioned, had very poor performance at the annual practice, took a few innings to shake off their winter rust. Really, the first 3 innings were basically the team's Spring Training and the Hits found themselves down 9-0.
The Bulldogs defense was pretty much perfect. Unlike our team, they caught the ball when it was hit to them, threw the ball to the proper base and didn't over and/or under throw their targets every single time. But that was only for the first three innings.
In the second half of the game, we pulled it together. Game ball winner, Zep, came through with the Hits' first RBI of season when he doubled in Terry and Matt. He followed that up by getting reprimanded by the umpire for "verbal interference." Basically, Zep yelled something while the other team was attempting to catch the ball.
When Alex Rodriguez did a similar thing in a real and actual MLB game, he did not suffer any punishment other than players and millions of fans referring to his actions as "bush league." And since we actually do play in the bush league, I couldn't very well justify punishing Zep, so he still got the game ball.
Anyhow, after Zep broke the seal, runs poured in. This new found offense combined with Sonya's excellent pitching allowed us to make it look respectable with a 9-5 loss.
I'd also like to thank the Team Mom Committee which crowned a new queen when Betsy stepped up to pre-order pizza for the post game party. Nice work, Betsy!
So next week, we will try to redeem ourselves at 8:30 against a team that put zero effort into coming up with a creative name, the West Coast Builders.
Turns out the mysterious "The Bureau" team is actually just a revamped version of our old rivals, the Bulldogs. The only difference is that now they are really, really good. More accurately, they are really, really good again since they were a top-tier team last spring before things went downhill for them.
The Solid Gold Hits welcomed a few new players to the squad for this game and they did not disappoint. Terry showed up with a totally tricked out version of our jersey with a baseball logo, olde English font and a nickname, "Striker," on the back. Our other newcomer, Matt, pleased everyone with his ramshackle running of the bases, nearly hurting himself on numerous occasions. That's the kind of foundation the Hits are built on.
The Solid Gold Hits who, it should be mentioned, had very poor performance at the annual practice, took a few innings to shake off their winter rust. Really, the first 3 innings were basically the team's Spring Training and the Hits found themselves down 9-0.
The Bulldogs defense was pretty much perfect. Unlike our team, they caught the ball when it was hit to them, threw the ball to the proper base and didn't over and/or under throw their targets every single time. But that was only for the first three innings.
In the second half of the game, we pulled it together. Game ball winner, Zep, came through with the Hits' first RBI of season when he doubled in Terry and Matt. He followed that up by getting reprimanded by the umpire for "verbal interference." Basically, Zep yelled something while the other team was attempting to catch the ball.
When Alex Rodriguez did a similar thing in a real and actual MLB game, he did not suffer any punishment other than players and millions of fans referring to his actions as "bush league." And since we actually do play in the bush league, I couldn't very well justify punishing Zep, so he still got the game ball.
Anyhow, after Zep broke the seal, runs poured in. This new found offense combined with Sonya's excellent pitching allowed us to make it look respectable with a 9-5 loss.
I'd also like to thank the Team Mom Committee which crowned a new queen when Betsy stepped up to pre-order pizza for the post game party. Nice work, Betsy!
So next week, we will try to redeem ourselves at 8:30 against a team that put zero effort into coming up with a creative name, the West Coast Builders.
March 10, 2008
Opening Night Preview
The new season is upon us.
Tomorrow night, the 2008 version of the Solid Gold Hits will debut against a team unacceptably named "The Bureau." If they are any bureau other than the FBI, I am going to insist that they change their name if we beat them. And, yes, by FBI I mean "Female Body Inspectors." Man, I love novelty t-shirts.
Anyhow, I have a feeling that attendance for this first game will be through the roof since it's opening night, it's a 6:30 game, the weather will be nice and nobody is bored with the season yet.
If you can remember back to October, we are riding a stunning 1-game winning streak and I'm sure we will carry that momentum right into this opening game.
I encourage all players to show up at 6...especially since most of you missed practice and probably need to re-learn how to throw a ball.
Fans and well-wishers, I encourage you to show up early too to get good seats. Just kidding, you can pretty much roll in any time you like.
The park is at 59th St & 8th Ave.
See you there!
Tomorrow night, the 2008 version of the Solid Gold Hits will debut against a team unacceptably named "The Bureau." If they are any bureau other than the FBI, I am going to insist that they change their name if we beat them. And, yes, by FBI I mean "Female Body Inspectors." Man, I love novelty t-shirts.
Anyhow, I have a feeling that attendance for this first game will be through the roof since it's opening night, it's a 6:30 game, the weather will be nice and nobody is bored with the season yet.
If you can remember back to October, we are riding a stunning 1-game winning streak and I'm sure we will carry that momentum right into this opening game.
I encourage all players to show up at 6...especially since most of you missed practice and probably need to re-learn how to throw a ball.
Fans and well-wishers, I encourage you to show up early too to get good seats. Just kidding, you can pretty much roll in any time you like.
The park is at 59th St & 8th Ave.
See you there!
2008 Solid Gold Hits Pitching Rotation
Pitching is the most vital part of Slow-pitch softball. Getting that ball over that stupid little plate is not an easy task. And if you don't find someone who can get the ball somewhere in the vicinity of the plate on a fairly consistent basis the game quickly changes from "softball" to simply "watching people walk around." Specifically, they walk around in a diamond shape and score things called "runs." Then we all get bored and cry.
Anyhow, the Solid Gold Hits have an excellent staff this season. Here are the scouting reports on this year's pitching rotation.
1. Sonya B. - Steady workhorse of the staff who has carried us to some of our most impressive wins and muddled through some of our most embarrassing defeats. I like having a female pitcher, so she'll see plenty of time on the mound this season...especially since I know she's only faking when she says she doesn't like to pitch.
2. Matt R. - Newcomer who earned a spot on the team through his relationship with one of our second-basewomen. Limited mobility from a severe wiffle ball injury keeps him from playing a position which requires him to move very much. This will limit him to pitcher and beer-swilling cheerleader...both positions at which he is strong.
3. Chris N. - Sporadic attendance due to having a child, living in Citrus Heights and working in Rocklin is the only thing keeping Chris from being our #1 starter. By pitching in like 40 other leagues at the same time, he has experience and accuracy rarely seen in Co-ed D League.
4. Coach Nick - In a pinch, I can get a few balls close to the plate every now and then.
Anyhow, the Solid Gold Hits have an excellent staff this season. Here are the scouting reports on this year's pitching rotation.
1. Sonya B. - Steady workhorse of the staff who has carried us to some of our most impressive wins and muddled through some of our most embarrassing defeats. I like having a female pitcher, so she'll see plenty of time on the mound this season...especially since I know she's only faking when she says she doesn't like to pitch.
2. Matt R. - Newcomer who earned a spot on the team through his relationship with one of our second-basewomen. Limited mobility from a severe wiffle ball injury keeps him from playing a position which requires him to move very much. This will limit him to pitcher and beer-swilling cheerleader...both positions at which he is strong.
3. Chris N. - Sporadic attendance due to having a child, living in Citrus Heights and working in Rocklin is the only thing keeping Chris from being our #1 starter. By pitching in like 40 other leagues at the same time, he has experience and accuracy rarely seen in Co-ed D League.
4. Coach Nick - In a pinch, I can get a few balls close to the plate every now and then.
Practice 2008 - Wrap-up
Practice 2008 was a tremendous success...at least for the Slugs who showed up early, got in some batting practice and dominated a scrimmage game against a team made from a combination of Luck Dragons, Solid Gold Hits and a case of Pabst Blue Ribbon.
The Solid Gold Hits only had six players show up and one of them left before even getting an at-bat, but I'm sure that those who were not in attendance have been sticking to a pretty strict off-season training regimen and will be ready to go for opening night.
If there were a game ball for practice, which there isn't, it would have gone to Dawn B. who, after years of peer pressure, finally caved in a showed up to a Solid Gold hits function. Sporting jeans and a fashion top, she impressed the coaching staff with her skill in the areas of hitting, throwing, batting and, most importantly, drinking. Welcome to the team DB!
I guess that's about it for practice.
The Solid Gold Hits only had six players show up and one of them left before even getting an at-bat, but I'm sure that those who were not in attendance have been sticking to a pretty strict off-season training regimen and will be ready to go for opening night.
If there were a game ball for practice, which there isn't, it would have gone to Dawn B. who, after years of peer pressure, finally caved in a showed up to a Solid Gold hits function. Sporting jeans and a fashion top, she impressed the coaching staff with her skill in the areas of hitting, throwing, batting and, most importantly, drinking. Welcome to the team DB!
I guess that's about it for practice.
March 05, 2008
Schedule Announced!
In what can quite possibly be foreshadowing of the upcoming season, I missed the "mandatory" coach's meeting because I went to the wrong place at the wrong time after drinking beer. That said, I still managed to secure a league schedule.
When I rolled into the softball office, the Co-ed meeting had been over for 10 minutes and the Women's league meeting was coming in 20 minutes. My conversation with the commissioner went like this:
Me: Sorry I missed the meeting. I kinda went to the wrong place at the wrong time after drinking beer. I'm assuming there weren't any major rule changes.
Him: There were, but I don't have time to go over them with you now. You're welcome stick around for the Women's league meeting.
Me: No thanks. Where's my schedule?
So, there's a chance that there are some rule changes, but I'm pretty sure he was bluffing. I guess we'll find out.
Also, the only team that's returning is the Luck Dragons. There are four new teams that we'll have to deal with...which is kinda scary, but it also means there is no Majority Rules. Cool.
Anyhow, here's the schedule. No 9:30 games! Woo hoo!
March 11 vs. The Bureau (I can't approve of this name) @ 6:30
March 18 vs. West Coast Builders @ 8:30
March 25 vs. Old Skool @ 7:30
April 1 vs. Luck Dragons @ 8:30
April 8 vs. Sacrilicious @ 7:30
April 15 vs. West Coast Builders @ 7:30
April 22 vs. Old Skool @ 8:30
April 29 vs. Sacrilicious @ 6:30
When I rolled into the softball office, the Co-ed meeting had been over for 10 minutes and the Women's league meeting was coming in 20 minutes. My conversation with the commissioner went like this:
Me: Sorry I missed the meeting. I kinda went to the wrong place at the wrong time after drinking beer. I'm assuming there weren't any major rule changes.
Him: There were, but I don't have time to go over them with you now. You're welcome stick around for the Women's league meeting.
Me: No thanks. Where's my schedule?
So, there's a chance that there are some rule changes, but I'm pretty sure he was bluffing. I guess we'll find out.
Also, the only team that's returning is the Luck Dragons. There are four new teams that we'll have to deal with...which is kinda scary, but it also means there is no Majority Rules. Cool.
Anyhow, here's the schedule. No 9:30 games! Woo hoo!
March 11 vs. The Bureau (I can't approve of this name) @ 6:30
March 18 vs. West Coast Builders @ 8:30
March 25 vs. Old Skool @ 7:30
April 1 vs. Luck Dragons @ 8:30
April 8 vs. Sacrilicious @ 7:30
April 15 vs. West Coast Builders @ 7:30
April 22 vs. Old Skool @ 8:30
April 29 vs. Sacrilicious @ 6:30
February 21, 2008
Practice 2008
This year's annual practice will be on March 8th at Tahoe Park (1pm). Not having played since our spectacular season-ending victory over the Bulldogs last October, I'm sure some of us are a little rusty. Therefore, we will freshen up our batting, fielding and, most importantly, drinking skills on this day. I'd hate to start the season unprepared and/or sober.
Joining us for Practice 2008 will be the Thursday night Slugs and our rivals from Tuesdays, the Luck Dragons. This should ensure that we have enough people for a game even with a bunch of flakers and no-shows (you know who you are).
Stay tuned to www.solidgoldsoftball.com for more details and pre-season information.
Oh, one last thing: An uncharacteristic oversight on my part resulted in "Former Co-worker's Baby Showers" being left off the list of "Unacceptable Excuses for Missing a Game." And, yes, practice counts as a game. So, ladies of the CVB, consider this one a free pass if you can't squeeze practice and the baby shower into your plans for March 8th. I assure you that the list will be amended so that, if you make a similar choice in the future, I can give you a well-deserved stink-eye.
Thanks.
Joining us for Practice 2008 will be the Thursday night Slugs and our rivals from Tuesdays, the Luck Dragons. This should ensure that we have enough people for a game even with a bunch of flakers and no-shows (you know who you are).
Stay tuned to www.solidgoldsoftball.com for more details and pre-season information.
Oh, one last thing: An uncharacteristic oversight on my part resulted in "Former Co-worker's Baby Showers" being left off the list of "Unacceptable Excuses for Missing a Game." And, yes, practice counts as a game. So, ladies of the CVB, consider this one a free pass if you can't squeeze practice and the baby shower into your plans for March 8th. I assure you that the list will be amended so that, if you make a similar choice in the future, I can give you a well-deserved stink-eye.
Thanks.
February 19, 2008
News from the League Office!
While no official schedule has been released, we do know that the season will start March 11, 2008.
Woo hoo!
Woo hoo!
New Domain Name!
http://www.coachnick.blogspot.com/ is now http://www.solidgoldsoftball.com/!!!
Even though the name is better, I wouldn't get your hopes up for improved content.
Even though the name is better, I wouldn't get your hopes up for improved content.
February 04, 2008
It's February!
Which means it's time to start planning for the upcoming season.
By now, all of you should have received your packets of flax seed oil and vitamin B12 shots. Please start the "program" ASAP to ensure that you'll be ready to go when the season starts in late March.
Our combined record over the past two season is a respectable 7-8-1. It's even more respectable when you factor in our lack of practice and fluctuating BAC.
This upcoming season will be notable for a number reasons:
1) First full season with new uniforms
2) Possible switch to Thursday nights (we'll have a vote soon)
3) Two new baby fans
4) Z told me he's buying his own glove
5) Increased sunflower seed consumption. Also, other snacks.
6) Possible departure of stupid Majority Rules from D League
7) Debut of new hats (If you were lucky enough to get one at the end of season party and have the poor fashion sense to wear it)
8) Our 2nd annual practice
9) Chance to lengthen our current winning streak (1 game)
10) Stupider blogs
Also, be on the lookout for your pre-season survey which I will use to help guide the Hits during our 2008 campaign.
By now, all of you should have received your packets of flax seed oil and vitamin B12 shots. Please start the "program" ASAP to ensure that you'll be ready to go when the season starts in late March.
Our combined record over the past two season is a respectable 7-8-1. It's even more respectable when you factor in our lack of practice and fluctuating BAC.
This upcoming season will be notable for a number reasons:
1) First full season with new uniforms
2) Possible switch to Thursday nights (we'll have a vote soon)
3) Two new baby fans
4) Z told me he's buying his own glove
5) Increased sunflower seed consumption. Also, other snacks.
6) Possible departure of stupid Majority Rules from D League
7) Debut of new hats (If you were lucky enough to get one at the end of season party and have the poor fashion sense to wear it)
8) Our 2nd annual practice
9) Chance to lengthen our current winning streak (1 game)
10) Stupider blogs
Also, be on the lookout for your pre-season survey which I will use to help guide the Hits during our 2008 campaign.
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