Team Unity

Ok team, here's the deal: apparently some of you have "lives outside of softball." This is unacceptable and does not promote team unity.

Some of you wrong-thinkers have decided to tend to the needs of your "families" instead of attending Tuesdays opening night game.

Here is a list of things which will be considered "rotten excuses" for missing a game:

*T-ball games

* School plays

* Family vacations

* Graduation ceremonies

* Work

* Grandma's birthday

* Grandma's surgery

* Anything grandma related

* Sickness

* Severe injuries

* Helping the less fortunate

* Nobel Prize acceptance ceremonies

* Hot air balloon rides

* Weddings (yours or others)

* Morbid obesity

* Pretty much anything else

Upon missing their first game with one of the above rotten excuses, offenders will be subject to a disappointed head shake and "the ol' stink eye" from the coach. If a second offense arises, the disappointed shake will be slightly more disappointed and the ol' stinkeye will be just a tad stinkier. The intensity of these punishments will become more severe with each offense culminating in a fist shaken above the head in frustration. You don't want that, do you?

That said, let me know if you'll be available for the game.

Thanks.